Because we can be happily single at 25

“Ah, so when are you getting married?” a colleague of mine one morning hit me with this very disturbing, turgid question! I posed for a minute and wondered when this community will ever leave me alone. Then I looked at the big picture and this indeed is an everyday question, coffee- tea gossip and for sure, every parents’ concern.

It saddens me that even in the 21st century women and even men are still being stigmatised as marriage materials after all. For women, regardless what sophisticated social status you rank at, how well educated you are, successful and ambitious you can be, remaining single is a challenge that could eliminate your chances in life as your parents, neighbours, and community expect you to be successful but, in fact, married and preferably with kids.

While young women are nowadays inclined to celebrate their progress and advancement in life, as single women, regardless a 25 years- age tag, they are faced with societies that keep women their chief concern. Women are always labelled and judged by the pre-conceived notions and inherited customs of their communities. Notwithstanding how far you advance in life, the marriage constitution should be your [women’s] ultimate goal. For this, if you are not married or at least engaged and you are 25, then you should know that it is too late now for you to find a proper spouse and settle in to establish a family. The common sense is that if you get to 25 without a marital status, you shall be single and alone for the rest of your life! How incredibly pathetic.

It does dazzle me that some women can be fooled by these empty threats and succumb to fit in the general category and marry because their families and society expect them to. What is even worse is that when women themselves narrow their horizons, pass on the same notions to the next generation, and stress the importance of seeking the accomplishment of a successful marriage constitution.

When a woman chooses to be single, she makes this decision because i. she is independent and has control over her own life and future ii. she wants to establish herself with a career that can grant her stability so she can grow even more independent iii. she wants to pursue her studies and build her capacity in a field of study she enjoys iv. she is different; she wants to opt out of the cultural norms and create her own realm and set her own boundaries. In short, she wants to defy her society and wants her voice to break the habit of being a marriage material to please a spouse at the end of the day and produce children. v she wants to be free; she knows this is not what she plans for her future because she knows she is not a puppet to let people tell her that she should be with somebody to be happy, accepted and like “them”. vi. she wants to be single because she knows being in a relationship will hinder her development in life. she should take in certain duties because she is the female and her partner was raised believing- stupidly- his manhood consider carrying some duties as shameful and forbidden- at least this is what they [his society] told him and it is the woman who does this and that.

To be single or not to be, regardless at what age that is, remains a personal decision entirely. Yes, we will be defying our societies, breaking the law of the traditions and customs; still we will be liberated and happy. Yes, you can be happy and single. When women fail to trust themselves and give up their lives because they should adjust, adopt and go with the flow, and when they link their happiness to a partner, they sign their death certificates.

We are free human beings. We have the free will to plan our lives as we see fit. You are single because you want to, not because some guy did not like/ fall in love with you, and certainly not because you are not pretty enough! You are beautiful, stunning, unique, powerful and self-determining. You are a woman and can be happy and single at 25, just be yourself.

 

Hello 2016…

As the 1st of January 2016 is coming to its end, I do know that I no longer wish to look back at anything from 2015, that being a success or failure. Everything happened for a reason, a great reason; we always come to such realisations late and sometimes it’s just we are too blind to see what was going around. Anyways, it’s all a past now and the mere thought will not make a difference now. What has happened is a memory buried into oblivion now. I am the human being of the now, of this very moment of 2016.

Of resolutions, I kept them simple and clear, to myself and for myself. Starting of today, I, wholeheartedly, determined, resumed my most preferred habits or reading and writing. These are the only two things in the universe I know I will suffer and vanish miserably without. When I read, I inhale purity and sacredness to exhale all the negativity and aching boredom and depression and breathe all freshness and purity.
There were times I was just letting days go by, all careless and worried! My heart was heavy, burdened with the ageing worries and anxious with the pathetic self-destructive concerns. I am over with that now, faithful and hopeful that I should now step up and take the necessary actions to make the most desired realities and dreams.

Every day  we wake up to a new day, new opportunities wake up in us and for us to tell us that we are alive today and we should LIVE our dreams and turn the fantasies into achievements and accomplishments. Stepping out of our comfort zones, bravely carrying out our missions, with zero fears of loss and failure will ensure we reach our destinations with dignity and pride, assured that we did the right thing and gave it our absolute efforts, time and hard work.  This should be our vision towards which we march full of hopes and aspirations.

This year I am dedicating these 365 days to LIVE MY LIFE AND BE ME, ONLY ME. I will not “look outside myself”. “I know who I am and who I may be if I choose”. And this is the time for me to choose to BE HAPPY.

I know there will be times I feel weak, vulnerable, fragile, yet, I will assure myself that these are obstacles aiming at deluding and hindering me from the right. I will put myself together and raise up again. Because I know I am good, I am ambitious, hopeful and faithful. I KNOW I DESERVE THE BEST. I WILL BE ME, LIVE FOR ME AND CONQUER.

#EMBRACE_TODAY, #WORK_HARD AND #WELCOME_10296857_1672792226333180_829104795_nTOMORROW.

Blogging101 Task #10: Building A Better Blogroll

With today’s task, I managed to build s better blogroll, and guess what, my assignment today covers the 3 different suggestions.

The first one, with the text widget, I added the Blogging101 badge. The funny thing is that as I was always looking into other blogs, I always wanted to add this badge to my blog, and never really paid attention to the tip on the sidebar, just until today.

The second thing is: Links widget: again to the sidebar, I added 8 blogrolls.

The third is: Blogs I Follow. I added 10 blogs I follow and find interesting and chose the “grid” display.

The fourth and finally: I have received a comment that suggests I specifically address the main objective of my blog, not just leave speaking about me, myself. And this is what I did.

Thus far- I can get some rest- I will be looking froward to writing some uncategorised and new posts which I will be sharing with you in the next coming days.

Don’t forget to leave your comments 🙂

Cheers,

Blogging101Task #9: Getting Inspired by the Neighbours

Thanks to A Letter I Wrote to Myself About Getting FatA Greatly Inspirational post that not only made my day, but greatly made sit to put down some thoughts I’ve been having in mind for some time now.

And going from there, my post: What Size Are You?

In this post I shed the light on women’s and men’s constant urge to stay fit and in shape; society judgments, worry and anxiety and continuous pursuit to lose weight and look fit and in shape regardless.

The post is just a random thought. Please feel free to comment and let me know that you were here 🙂

You are Humans.

Always on the go to lose weight and become thinner to look good and perfect and attract their attention? Ever skipped your meals and the sophisticated luxurious food because you feared that you are becoming fatter and uglier? And always putting yourself in community’s preconceived labels and stereotypes where you can’t but look “stunningly thin and sexy”?

Let me tap on your shoulders and put you in the true picture.

We are always obsessed with sizes,figures, shapes, looks, numbers and numbers and more. It’s always numerical, rigid, irrational, senseless, indistinct and dull…………..Objects?!

What drives these few lines to this very brief conclusion is the fact that this is exactly how most of our youth, women and even men, look at themselves.

Everyone is on a constant burnout to maintain a fabulous body, that’s absolutely fit and give her/ him the freedom to wear the smallest of sizes and thinnest dresses and outfits.

Everyone is going a banana about how they look physically from the outside; extreme merciless diets- most of the times leading to anorexia nervosa, working out, body building, suppliers, and sometimes even worse, going on hunger strikes for the sake of nailing it and reaching the goals of having the “body” that pleases the eye and set instincts on fire.

And while doing all of that, we forget about our spirituality, the natural balance that weds our heart- mind- and soul. We simply go astray and end up “objects” and “slaves” to this trend! Becoming mere objects. Because that’s all our youth are doing now; they neglect their human needs and let themselves be exposed and objectified by the irrationality and irresponsible attitudes that are spreading like wildfire on the tele, social media and even out in the streets and make people believe that only with the “perfect body” you can be successful, rich, famous and accepted!

Total insanity.

Let me tell you that most of the times I was/ am not happy with my body. That’s fine, so far. However, what’s making me living with this body is my mom. I have a mom whom whenever hears me complaining about my figure and how I look, always assures me that I am fit, I am healthy with this body and I look good.

But guess what, this is not always enough ,,, good enough to make me really appreciate how I look and be convinced that as long as I am healthy, there’s no need to panic about what others think of me.

It’s not wrong to take into consideration what people think of you and who/ how you are, yet, when this is over-considered and it becomes your ultimate priority to listen to what others think of you,,, here you are harming yourself.

I believe the first step to overcome such dilemma is to stop listening to what people say- you know they always talk and will keep talking,,, just leave them- and start thinking for your own self. First things first, is having self-esteem and confidence of what we have. Then, looking into where things are going wrong, and trying to provide genuine solutions, not again, let ourselves be projected and labelled. We act as we are comfortable about.

All the sexy and sizzling beauty icons and models you see on the TV and viral on social media are created for certain purposes, and are advertised to you by the sick mentalities of businesses that only seek the financial profits at the end of the day.

You are not an object! You can always aspire being healthy, fit and good to look at, BUT, do not let that take over your life.

DO NOT let yourself be labelled and categorised. You are not a puppet that should let people dress her and play wither whenever and however they want. You are a human being. It’s not always how look from the outside, you should also take care of your inner beauty; your soul.

We need to remind ourselves that our bodies are the vehicle that gives the tour around life/ Just accept who you are, take control and do not let your ears be opened to the common public!

In short it is your essence that makes your stand out in life NOT your flesh and skin.

To break the ice, play this song

Blogging101 Task #8: Being a good neighbour

It’s not only with this task I chose to be a good neighbour. Since I started this course, I started surfing other fellow bloggers blogs, and not only those I follow and who follow me back, however, everyone I find interesting and I can relate to their About Page and posts.

Thus far, I realised it’s only about sharing and engaging with other people’s posts; it’s rather the fact that I get to see a glimpse of what people are like, how they think, perceive and interpret and process information, facts, experiences and daily encounters.

Reading one’s post, takes you on a journey to the realms of their life. Their identity, thoughts, culture, traditions and most importantly, them as human beings.

I should admit that when I write, I feel I am naked! Because only with writing we let ourselves be exposed to the others, to the public. With writing you cannot hide, bluff or lie; you can only let your inners translate what’s dwelling inside to the outside.

My daily habit is not to hover over the Freshly Pressed posts and get in touch with what is going around me.

Many have inspired me so far, if not with writings, they did with ideas on how to build and grow an eye-catching and appealing.

My goal now is by the end of this course, I hope I can have friend-neighbour- fellow bloggers, whom I can be sure will be in touch on a daily basis. SO far, I have 3 and I trust this will multiply as I start writing about many other different things.

Blogging101 Task #7: Keep Personalising- Headers and Backgrounds

With today’s challenge, again I am not changing anything. I am keeping it SIMPLE.

Scrolling down and back up in my blog makes me confident that this is what I am looking for. The blog, header, background, is just simply sophisticated enough for me. And just realising that great themes come in simply delivered packages; designs.

I am keeping the blank white background, colourful header, title and subs. I’ve been receiving some generous feedback from fellow bloggers and their comments left me assured that I am on track and is working in line with my vision. So, for now, at least, I am not changing anything. (Seriously, having a crystal clear vision in mind of the objective and mission of your blog helps you toward achieving your goals).

In the next days, I will be adding new widgets and lists to my menu. (Still figuring out what can help promote my blog). Shall keep you posted on the updates of course.

Thank you!

Dears,

I cannot tell you how happy your sweet, kind and generous words made me, rejoicing with happiness, relief, ecstasy and merry; I simply cannot be any happier. I’ve been having a rough week so far, and only in the afternoons, after an exhaustingly wrecking work day, I crawl to my keyboard to find solace in writing. And just going into my WordPress and finding your feedback, likes and comments, put me on cloud nine- feeling like floating on air with euphoria. That’s life I think!

I am utterly happy, thankful and grateful for having you all. Knowing that my writings interest you even though you do not know me in person, indeed stands out and adds colours and flavours to my blog and life.

Everyday blogging is like sitting on the edge of excitement; dicing and rocking with the words; letting go of all the awful burdens of tiresome, boredom and anxiety and taking in a dose of optimism and sighs of relief. Blogging thus far has proven to keep me at oneness with myself. Because I know that when it’s too hard for me to talk about something, someone across the universe, and somewhere cross the continents, would care to read and listen to the words as they pulse with the unspoken rhythms.

Bloggers,

Thanks a lot for your continuous support. Please keep in touch and do not forget to pop into my blog every now and then.

Besties 🙂